how to be my dog’s sex toy

It’s no doubt that we’ve all got some peculiar gifts and I have the most peculiar of all. I’m the official sex toy of my dog; I’m not even joking, I really am. It all started quite innocently one day when my pooch simply decided she wanted to play with something more interesting than her conventional toys. Instead of getting a bowl of food or a ball, she wanted to play with two human legs. I have to admit that the things she does with them borders on the erotic.

I was probably a bit too naïve when I bought my pup. I didn’t take into account the lengths she’d go to when she wanted attention—later I found out that her being a dog was the least of my worries. It’s an understatement to say that she’s been testing the limits of my patience since then. But I don’t mind it so much. In fact, it’s hard for me to not give football cleats to her claws.

My pup currently likes to pretend I’m her personal sex toy and she takes it very seriously. She’ll realign my legs and adjust my position so I’m comfortable, which really is my cue to move around and make her happy. I can’t even begin to tell you how embarrassed I was the first time she decided to play this game. But I mustered up the courage to play along, Penis Rings and I haven’t regretted it since.

My dog demands quite a lot of attention but that’s the only thing that makes her happy, so I have to accept that she needs it. After all, I’m the one that decided to get her in the first place. She also loves to cuddle and that’s one of the best things about having her around. So when she’s ready to show her affection, I know it’s my cue to bring out the sex toy in me.

To aid in her imaginative playtime, I’ve started carrying extra accessories such as stuffed animals and squeaky balls around with me. It’s funny to watch her perky ears perk at the sound of a squeaky toy. Pets bring such joy in our lives and Penis Rings I suppose this could be my contribution to that start-up cost.

Although it’s really awkward, I can’t help but laugh at my dog’s antics sometimes. It feels as if she has a secret agenda; a plan where she’ll come out victorious. New behaviors learn, old ones diminish, but with her it’s always something different.

Sometimes I like to watch her from a distance as she goes about her business. Sometimes I discover new things about her and about myself. I can’t deny that even if the whole sex toy gig isn’t exactly what I wanted, it’s been quite thrilling and I’ve had fun.